Self Love and Spread Love

How to love yourself even not fitting to Artificial Beauty Standards

Beauty standards and their Reality

Many people suffer from anxiety and depression on the things they can't control. And there are somethings they can control but they don't know that they can. In today's world everything is possible, and people think that with money they can do anything just like when people don't like something in their physical appearance, they think that they can change it if they have money. And this is the cause of rising beauty standards day by day and the fun fact is those standards are not even natural or attractive. What makes a person attractive is their character. But in today's world people get attracted to others for their appearance but it's a fact that this attraction has always been proved temporary because for longer run people with you will know your reality who you really are and what your character is.

In the past few years since pandemic people are having more anxiety than usual. Yes! Corona fear was one of the main reasons but low self esteem, self hate, and fear to show up was also a main reason. As many of us got weight or skin issues due to sitting all day and unhealthy eating patterns. And that is absolutely not right because things which are unhealthy for you, can never be justified to intake. But many people became more conscious about themselves and people who have no control over it for example people with certain disease who can't lose, or gain weight become more frustrated, and they lose their confidence. My point here is that if you have control over loosing or gaining weight you should do it for your health but if not then torturing yourself, hating yourself and loosing your confidence just because of these artificial beauty standards is injustice.

Weight is just one variable in these standards. Others are Perfect eyes, cheeks, lips, hair, hands, teeth, skin, and the list go on and it doesn't end. People are physically torturing and tolerating severe pain just to fulfill these standards of being perfect and irony is that when you fulfill it they would say you were better before🤐. Even if they don't say it but what's the point of going through this much pain, emotionally, physically, and financially too as these perfection costs some monetary value too and bring people to footpath😅.

And when people can't afford it, they are always thinking how to get it done as soon as possible, from where can I get this much money. They start assuming that life is going to be perfect when I'll get this done with my appearance. They think that their appearance is the reason of their low confidence and due to this thinking, they lose even more confidence.

But the truth is

NO! NO! NO!

Life is never going to be perfect even if you do it, you are never going to be happy even if you look perfect. Appearance has no connection with your happiness that lies only within you. If you are not happy with what you have then you'll never going to be happy with what you are wishing for. The only thing you need to understand is that the person who wants to be attracted to you by your appearance not your character then is that person worth your attention?

First you need to accept yourself the way you are.

When you'll accept that it is what it is, and you can not control it even if you have money then you won't be thinking about the solutions all the time to get rid of what you have and get what you don't have. You'll accept that life will be keep going with this and it doesn't matter at all. When you'll accept it, you will stop thinking about others opinion too, you will have more time to work on other things, you'll grow mentally, you'll achieve more things which are worth importance. For example, any goal you have about your career. When you will be accepting that you are just the way you are then you won't waste your time in thinking about it.

Secondly you need to surround yourself with positive people.

Surrounding yourself with people who are positive and optimistic, who appreciate you for your achievements and the character you have, who will help you grow emotionally, mentally and in life as your career as well. Just observe these types of people who are worth your importance and time. Filter them out and avoid those people who are always keep you conscious about your looks and weaknesses. Well, that's not very easy nor very difficult to avoid such type of people because sometimes they are in your family, your colleagues with whom you have to work with so, you simply can never cut them out of your life. But the things you have to do is ignore them, never become too personal in your conversations with them so that they can say something about you and give them a nice shut up call in your own professional way, so they won't utter such things next time.

Third and most important step is to love your self.

After accepting what you are you can even start loving yourself. Just appraise what you have. Ignore the weaknesses. Yes! Obviously work on them but don't let your weaknesses overcome your strengths. Even when nobody is appreciating, appreciate yourself. Don't expect someone to come and tell you that you are beautiful. Not expecting from someone and enjoying your own company is one of the greatest blessings that leads to a healthier life. Just tell yourself that you are beautiful because you are just the way you were meant to be. Treat yourself as the most important person in your life, whose appreciation and opinion are the most important. Give royalty to yourself. Give treats to yourself. Eat healthy for yourself, wear good for your self. Just do what makes YOU happy. Start loving your achievements and the good things you do. Focus on good things and you'll not have time to focus on things you can't control.

And lastly spread love.

Some people just love themselves and give importance to themselves so much that they forget about what other people need. You should give importance to yourself but not only to yourself. You should be your priority but not only you. You must take care of the needs of people close to you. When people love themselves, they become a happier version of themselves but those are the people who bring happiness in this world. You must share your happiness with others too in need, you must lead others too to become optimistic. Maybe it can be your love or words that were needed for them to change their life. So, keeping yourself a priority, spread love whenever you get a chance.

Life is too short to think and waste time on achieving perfection in your appearance that is going to give you nothing but some artificial people who are attracted to your outer beauty who are not worth it and not going to help you grow mentally, emotionally, and spiritually. You must give time to yourself to work on your inner beauty and mental health. Then people who are worth your importance and who want to see you grow and be happy, will be attracted to you.

You are the main source of your happiness so, create your happiness and also become a reason for a smile on others face too as when you are happy, you give a beautiful vibe to others that forces them to get attracted to you.

OCD- Myth vs Reality!!

OCD- Myth vs Reality!! Cause and symptoms?

 

Have you ever noticed around yourself someone doing certain things repeatedly? Someone being over conscious about hygiene or too organized about their living patterns?

Well, that may or may not be a normal behavior!

Yes! Some people are very conscious about being neat and clean, organized and live in their comfort zone that is their personal choice or preference.

But problem arises when some people relate these preferences with a very common term nowadays that is OCD (Obsessive Compulsive Disorder). And also when people take this disorder very normally or deny it.

So the question arises here is :

what basically OCD is?

As the name suggests that it's a disorder and a serious psychiatric condition. Obsessive Compulsive means that a person suffering this order has no control over the behavior he/she is doing It's compulsory for the individual to do certain task for which he/she is being obsessed with otherwise they will be in a state of anxiety or different individuals have different outcomes or behavior for example, someone will keep shivering unless he/she is done with doing that certain task or they may feel something pinching their minds etc. The obsession in this case maybe in the form of intrusive thoughts, images or impulses and people with OCD have no control over these thoughts or impulses.

Myths about OCD

There are common myths about OCD

One common myth is that people relate repeatedly hand washing with OCD.

Yes, it may or may not be a sign. Some people are hygiene conscious but when this habit is consuming a lot of your time at home, at school, or at work or anywhere and you become anxious without doing it or your behavior or mood changes when you don't wash your hands for particular number of times and your mind is filled with intrusive thoughts like this act of yours can cause illness to you or people around you, then it is a sign of OCD. But when sometimes, you want to wash your hands for particular number of times but you didn't get a chance as you were running out of time or any other reason so, you feel bad for a moment but you forget it later then it is totally normal. Other common habits of OCD patients are walking in certain patterns, organizing everything in perfect alignments.

The main reason of distress for OCD patients is that they understand that there compulsions and behavior is not normal but they have no control over their thoughts and the responses they show and when they go against their OCD they get frustrated.

While talking about being a patient of OCD people usually try to hide this as this is considered as a taboo or stigma. On the other side some people take it very lightly and relate their usual habits as OCD for example, someone who like organized things will say that they have OCD about this or there are some people who like to keep their things in even numbers. But in actual OCD is much more than being hygiene conscious and organized. It is also not a stigma as a person who has OCD is also a patient just like other patients like diabetic, heart patients etc. they also have treatments and therapy for this disorder but people are not aware of this because they don’t consider it a disorder just like many other mental disorders.

 

So, what are the real causes of OCD?

This question have been under research for a very long period of time. And the correct answer is still not found. Some researchers have proved it to be a neurological disorder so, it is due to brain functions and some have suggested that it can be a genetic disorder.

The good part of it is that it has a cure. One way is to get proper medication from specialists and the other is to get proper therapies by psychologists. But early detection of OCD is necessity to get cured. As OCD leads to more and more frustration and anxiety which will become more difficult to be cured with time passage.

But it is very important for a patient to accept that they are suffering from a certain illness and only than it is possible for them to treat it. But that is very difficult even in today’s era where many famous people such as David Beckham, Justin Timberlake, Katy Perry and Leonardo DiCaprio etc. also suffer from these problem but still people don’t accept it completely. They just ignore it thinking that it will be fine in some time neglecting the fact that this is a mental disorder and when it form the worst shape then they consult doctors or psychiatrists but it is sometimes too late to treat it quickly. It will take time to get treated so it is the best to seek help in the beginning stages.